Posts Tagged ‘family’

Can’t choose family…

August 7, 2009

So we’ve had a bit of annoying time recently regarding our family holiday. Myself, my Brother, my Mum and Dad are going to Barcelona with my Auntie and two Cousins at the end of the month. Now, my brother and myself have sacrificed alot to allow this holiday to go ahead – I gave up a weeks work at the Edinburgh TV Festival, and Matthew will be missing his A-Level results and so will potentially have trouble getting into University if he has to go into clearing. However all of a sudden, the other three are wanting to drop out! What makes things worse, is that going back about a month ago, my parents came into some money and so were debating dropping out of the holiday ourselves to go for something a little further afield like Florida, Canada or Vegas, but we didn’t because we knew the others wouldn’t be able to afford the upgrade.

Family is supposed to stick together. I guess however on this occasion water may have been thicker than blood…


Race for Life 09

July 7, 2009

Hello everyone!

I am once again entering myself into the Race for Life this year. For those of you that don’t know, it is a 5k run in order to raise money for Cancer research. I would really love your help to kick this disease’s ass, so please sponsor me at:

For everyone who has been affected by Cancer… let’s fight it together.


May 1, 2009

So folks, the return of the Internet brings the return of the Perry (that’s me by the way..), and so I guess it would be appropriate to fill you in on all things April-like. I tell you something, it’s been one hell of a month! There has been birthdays, musicals, theme parks, bus rides, beaches, girls, hair dye, drinking, work, rugby …and more drinking! I guess lets start from the very beginning, after all, it is a very good place to start…

So the month kicked off with a new hair colour …perhaps not the emo extreme some may have expected, but I now happen to be a rather pleasant strawberry blonde rather than a full blown ginger ninja – I like it. I guess the next thing then to change was the turning 22. If I had had the Internet at the time, you would have read a slightly dramatic and emotional blog about the woe that comes with my family all together in one room …thankfully for you, a month later and I’m over it! Phew… Instead, you get to read about the jolly times, which were that I did infact have an awesome party with all my friends 🙂  They all came out, bought me cards and drinks, came gay clubbing with me and kissed me – who could ask for more really?! In all seriousness it was an amazing night, and made me realise how lucky I am with the amazing group of friends I have at the moment. Oh, I also saw RENT for my birthday, which is to mark show #1 of April!!

After the birthday, there was a period of work…much much work. Sadly the Easter holidays were upon us and so the cinema became very popular again …damn those schools and all their time off!! Hehe! There was also a trip to the opticians in the mix there somewhere, where I found out that I have good enough eye sight to become a fighter pilot if I so wished – always a fact handy to know! :p  At some point or another there was also a fantastic trip to the beach within said holiday period. I went along (after a rather luscious carvery!) with the boys (Alex, Christian, Tim and Andy) and the girl (Nikki) to play some ultimate frisbee, dodgems and football …all topped off with a stroll along the rock pools and an ice cream. Throw in some arcade games, a race car top score, cuddles and manga that sounded like porn (you had to be there!), and you have a rather neat summery of the afternoon! Lol!

The rest of April is starting to become a bit of a blur I must admit. There was a sad event following the beach day, a departure that upset me more than I expected …but there were good times too! I went to London for one thing and visited the Dungeons, the Aquarium, and saw both Wicked and Phantom of the Opera on the West End. I honestly could go back right now and see Wicked for a 3rd time – I think it’s truly one of my all times favourites (and that’s saying something!). On the musical theatre front, I also went to see Cabaret (but in Cardiff this time) a few days ago, and was blown away by how good the performances were for that – was so much better than the film!

A group trip to Alton Towers was the next exciting adventure of April I suppose. It was a bit of a rainbow trip, with all the gays from work (myself, Rachel, Ally and Dan) in one car singing along to Journey and such :p In all seriousness though, it was a really amazing two days. We had so much fun on all the rides (despite the fact that it rained all day we were there and so walked around looking like idiots in those ridiculous plastic ponchos…), and were better company all together than we ever expected I think. Plus the gossiping about work was an event not to be missed! Haha!

I guess the final note-worthy event of April 2009 then was my trip to Varsity rugby. This event is basically like a lower class, Welsh version of Oxbridge, where Swansea University takes on Cardiff University in a host of sporting activities to see who reigns supreme.  Unsurprisingly, this year it was Cardiff. I was there however (little difference it made) cheering on the old homestead of Swansea! It was also really good to see a few of the old Uni buddies out and about, and then not so good seeing a few of the others …cider helped with that transition mind! As it was probably my last ever Varsity mind, I did have a very good time …wouldn’t have missed it for the world.
“Try harder!!”

All in all, this was actually a far less entertaining blog than I had planned. I do apologise for this fact, and promise that I will be more ‘fun’ next time around. I went for facts rather than floss this time around as a few of my friendly readers out there have been curious as to what has been going on in my hermited, non-Internet existence. Judge for yourselves… :p


Working hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Paying anything to roll the dice
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on

Strangers, waiting, up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people, living just to find emotion
Hiding somewhere in the night

Don’t stop believing
Hold on to that feeling
Streetlight people

~ Journey – Don’t Stop Believing
( Dedicated to Dan ;p )

Drama, drama, drama…

March 27, 2009

Things got pretty dark in the Perry household last night. All I’ve wanted to do all day is talk it through with the one person that might make it all easier for me, but I’m not exactly in a position to be asking any favours right now, so instead I’m going to vent to you fine fellows. Let’s just say that his version of events is the censored account of the evening, and if you think it sounds bad, it was a hell of a lot worse that that …believe me.

So here’s the gist of what’s going on. On Saturday, it’s my cousin Becky’s 18th birthday party. As a polite gesture, my auntie then said that my brother and I could each bring a +1 to the event. Naturally, my brother wants to bring his boyfriend. This fact however has led to more tension than I actually thought possible. Instead of everyone just discussing their opinions, they have all gone completely off the handle. Basically when my brother told my parents he wanted to bring James they went really funny with him and said that they didn’t want him there. This then made my brother naturally want to rebel even more, and so is insisting that James will be there. My mother tried to explain that she’s just worried because our entire family will be there, and my grandparents and some of the older relatives know nothing about Matt’s lifestyle. This then lead to Matt shouting about how it’s just because my parents are ashamed of him and that they don’t want him to be happy and don’t care about him. This then is where things got nasty …now I don’t approve of the way Matt reacted, but what my Mum followed with was just uncalled for. She basically decided she was going to have a little shout of her own back, and blurted that it’s my brother’s responsibility then to be upfront with my grandparents, and that if the shock, worry and stress affects my grandmother, then he can live with that on his conscious. Let’s just say, the evening ended in tears, which continued long into this morning where round 2 commenced. The jury is still out on whether they will make up, and God knows what’s going to happen at this damn party if this is the prelude to it all! Sometimes I wish I could just escape…

To try and think in the positive and end the post on a bit of a more encouraging note, maybe I can fill you in on what I have been up to since my last posting. First of all my Internet is still not up and running and so I am once again stealing my cousin’s (not all family is all bad all the time it seems!). I guess then that there has been two note worthy events since last Friday, beginning with Saturday where I went out with Matt, James and my friend Burke to see Little Shop of Horrors on stage in Cardiff. I have to say, I wasn’t exactly sure what I was expecting from this show, but whatever it was, this far exceeded it! It truly was fantastic. The songs, cast and set were all amazing …not to mention that we had really brilliant seats in the circle. It is definitely a show I would recommend to anyone that hasn’t seen the production live, and I would 100% go and see it again one day. Plus, while in the theatre, my brother and I ended up booking tickets to go and see Cabaret in May! For those Brits that read this and are in to reality TV, who remembers I’d Do Anything, the Andrew Lloyd Webber search for a new Nancy in Oliver? Well, remember Samantha Barks the hot, young contestant who came 3rd? She’s the lead! I can’t wait! 🙂

The second of my blogtastic events was going out on Monday night to a house party with some of the guys from work. Now this was actually a really good night even though I had to get up for work the next day after only 4 hours sleep! We played drinking Family Guy (which was a bit of a disaster as we made up a few too many drinking rules!), and danced to a hell of a lot of cheese, including the time warp, macarena, 5678, and drinking Roxanne …was quite a mission I have to admit! Oh, and that’s all before I even explain the main hilarity to the evening, when (without me knowing) the guys decided they’d try and set me up with their lesbian friend. Lets just say, that boys are the least subtle of people, and it was just generally the most cringe worthy and disastrous thing ever (we in fact didn’t even speak one word to each other all night!). It was the biggest case of “you’re gay and you’re gay, so be gay together” I’ve come across! It does amuse me when people don’t realise that it doesn’t exactly work like that, and you have to fine the other person at least moderately attractive …oh well, at least now they know that I was serious when I said I’m not even remotely interested in butch! Ha!

Oh, I just remembered something else worthy of writing about! I also went to see Marley and Me with one of the girls on Tuesday night. It was a surprisingly good film, and despite the fact that I do not and have never owned a dog, I still cried like a sap at the end!

Two weeks of me!

March 20, 2009

Now, don’t get too excited, this post does not in fact declare my return to cyber space …I’ve just found another poor soul to lend me their connection (I’m getting quite good at that…)! So, what I’m going to do is try and cram in as much as I can think of that I’ve been up to in the last two weeks for you …it will feel like I was never even gone! Oh, and in case you are wondering, I’m not going to add any PostSecret posts, as this blog will probably be long enough without them

Well, working in a cinema, it has been a pretty busy fortnight for films. I’ve seen at least six that I can remember (which I feel is pretty impressive…). First of all I saw the haunting thriller The Unborn, the most important part of which was when the lead wears a shirt that I own! Next of which came Hotel for Dogs with the lovely Emma Roberts …and no I’m not ashamed to admit a little crush! Young Victoriafollowed with again another crush, this time in the form of Emily Blunt (how lucky is Michael Buble?!). Then, and by far the most epic, came Watchmen. What a film! I really enjoyed this one, although I feel that it’s only really going to be fans of the graphic novel that completely get it all. Mind you, if the enticement of attractive folk in latex outfits is enough for you …I’m sure you’ll enjoy it too!

The most recent I’ve watched was Lesbian Vampire Killers, and then Bolt just today. LVK was quite amusing, but is definitely a film made for 15 year old boys (the slow motion kissing and boob shots more than prove that…). It made me laugh out loud a few times anyway, so what more can you ask for? Bolt then was reallygood …but then I am a huge sucker for anything that Disney/Pixarcome up with! Plus, as my manager Rob keeps telling me, I was in the film …apparently I’m the splitting image of Penny! Ha!

Not to mention that in the comfort of my own home, I’ve been busy watching the Alienquadrology (“they’re coming out of the goddamn walls!”) and Double Indemnity, the very first noir film I’ve watched (and enjoyed!) without being told to do so by a University professor!

We’ve been apart for so long that I have even finished two books and am half way through another! One of the guys from work leant me the Watchmen graphic novel, which was really awesome and I read in just a few days. Next then was The Dark River by John Twelve Hawks, which was a sequel to a book I wrote about not that long ago called The Traveller. Now normally I find I’m disappointed by sequels, but I really loved this book …it’s a real dystopian view of a society oblivious to all the ways their freedom is lost through the expansion of technologies, such as surveillance and tracking, masquerading as for our own protection. It’s quite scary actually, and it’s not such a far-fetched future for our existing society. After finishing this, I decided it was probably a good idea to move onto something a little lighter, and so am now reading Yes Man by Danny Wallace. Now this book really is amazing (and I’m only half way through!)! It had me in stitches from the prologue alone, and strangely is quite inspiring and really does make me want to say “Yes” more to opportunity.

Sadly the lack of Internet has meant that I am seriously behind on my downloads, which means I am yet to see The L Wordfinale. Due to a very kind work friend of mine however, I am up to date with Dollhouse! Now this really is a good show! I must admit, I was slightly disappointed by the pilot (it just didn’t feel like it was a Joss creation), but episode two blew apart any doubts I had! I’ve also managed to catch the third and fourth episodes now, and have yet to be let down! I’ve also started on Season 4 of One Tree Hill this week. Oh, and what about Skins?! How amazing has that show become this series? Now I know that there is many a cynic out there thinking “Hmmm, isn’t this the series that finally has lesbians?” …Well, you’re not wrong, but I promise it’s not the only reason that I love it!

Life has been pretty interesting over the last fortnight – first of all, I got offered a place at the Edinburgh TV Festival again this year, but sadly am on holidays at the same time so can’t make it – gutted! Then a piece of bad news got turned into some great news where, my brother’s school trip to New York got cancelled and so to try and to make it up to him, my parents are taking us to London for a few days in April, where we’re going to see the sights and watch Wicked again and Phantom of the Opera.

Now, onto events that I have actually partaken in – I’ve been drinking a lot the last week or so. Now many would raise an eyebrow at why this is a good thing, but I promise you, it’s been the good kind of drinking and not the excessive bad kind of drinking! Now let me think…the first big night, was when there was this huge drama at work, involving a bit of a boy-girl-girl triangle which I don’t really want to go into. Anyways, it all ended pretty shit and so I was in much need of cheering – cue Stephand alcohol! We literally spent the night with three bottles of aftershock and some peach snaps, discussing how life would be just so much easier if either she would become a gay, or if I would turn into a man! Ha! The next night of drinking was actually the very next night, where we went over some of the guys from work’s house and played drinking Jenga. Now if you have never partaken in said game, I warn you, it is not for the faint of heart! It’s basically a mixture of Jenga and ring of fire, where I discovered that I am actually quite good at Jenga. Stephon the other hand is not good at Jenga… Let’s just say the night ended with her telling me that I’d very definitely have to undress her, as I’m practically carrying her upstairs to where we were sleeping! Impressively, she did get up and go to work for 10am the next day, and we plan to repeat this Monday night where it is however my turn to work the next day (wish me luck!!)

The next drinking occasion was also somewhat of a mini adventure. I drove to Bristol on the weekend to visit my friend Amy, and it was the very first time that I’d driven over the bridge and into England on my own (I was geekily excited about this fact!). In true style, there was much cider drinking that took place, and though I didn’t really see much of Bristol (though I did catch the St Patrick’s Day parade…), it was a nice weekend away from all the drama at home. The most recent drinking then took place right back West, where I went out with the LGBT in Swansea (where as you can see from below was where my last Internet thieving took place!). Now this was actually a really good night out! I must admit, when I first got there and discovered that most of the people that I knew (Ruth, Adam F, Adam H, Shegs, Sefton…) were not going to be out – I panicked. It turned out to be a needless panic, as the people I did know that were out more than made up for it (Kirsty, Jo, Dom and Izzy!), and I met some awesome new members (Lizzie, Ria and Simon especially), who would be more than enough incentive to make the trip back to good old Swansea more often. I even managed to have a drunken walk down the Marina…and no, going to Tesco at 3am for a Double Decker was not my finest moment! Ha! Swanseawas more than just a night out mind you, as I also had a really nice hangover day with lunch at the Brynamor. I also ended up seeing two familiar faces in my less than attractive state – little Dan (thankfully I don’t think he saw me…) and Stacey who used to be on my course! What are the chances?!

I think that might be just about it actually. Oh no, wait…I also washed my car! (How could I forget that?!) I mean I’ve had some other odd days out with some work people, but that was generally just to see a film or catch a bite to eat. It’s been nice having so many options of things to do mind and going to different places with different people. I’m pretty excited for the next two weeks actually! I’m going into Cardiff to see Little Shop of Horrors on stage with my brother and Burke tomorrow, over the boys drinking on Monday, my cousins 18th birthday on the Saturday, seeing a stage performance of Rent on Wednesday, and then come my own birthday celebrations with a couple of big nights out planned! Things couldn’t look much better!

It’s been a while…

March 17, 2009

So before you wonder where I’ve been, it’s important to mention that it’s all my mother’s fault! Basically, she seems to have accidentally downloaded some kind of virus onto our computer, which not only destroyed my Internet connection, but also wormed its way through my entire PC deleting everything. And I mean EVERYTHING! I’ve lost my documents, music, downloads and all my pictures …ranging right from Graduation and my ball, to my holiday in Italy, my friend’s wedding, my grandparents’ 50th anniversary… (you get the idea!). It also now means that I have not used the net in the best part of 2 weeks, other than when I’ve had the odd chance to steal someone else’s and sneak a peak at Facebook. All in all, it’s not good and I’ve discovered I’d rather throw up on my own face than be without the Internet!

Meanwhile Kirsty has been a cracking host and has not only provided me with said Internet for a moment, but  has fed me, and also has had me in stiches while comparing herself to a “slightly fat member of the Saturdays” as she strips! haha!

So, as much as I realise this is a lame blog, I have zero time to go into depth of all that has happened to me since the 5th (and it’s surprisingly ALOT!). This really is just an opportunity for me to tell you all that I am still alive, and as soon as my Internet is back up and running again you will once more be hearing plenty from me.

I hope this doesn’t upset too many of you…


Signed, sealed, delivered lost in the post.

With tired eyes, tired minds, tired souls…

February 13, 2009

Today was a tough day. Today was the day that we buried my Nan. It’s been 2 weeks since she died, and so the limbo has finally ended – dust to dust. It has literally been the most surreal day imaginable.

To begin with, it was the first time I had been into my Nan’s house since she died. I kept expecting to see her pop her head around the corner and for her to be there fussing over everyone …it just felt like an intrusion without her there, and she always felt uncomfortable with too many people in her house – she wouldn’t have liked it.

Next, my brother literally did not stop crying the whole day. When the priest came to the house he started, continuing in the car there, getting worse once at the crem. He broke my heart during the service. He cried like I’ve never seen anyone cry before. I just sat with him, hugging him. I felt so useless. It was also the first time that I’d really had a chance to let go and cry for myself. It was a relief.

My cousin saw a PostSecret from this weeks selection on Frank’s website and thought I’d sent it in. She doesn’t know about this blog, which makes things stranger, as it was the exact same secret that I posted a few days ago on here about grandparents and memory. This same cousin and I also chose the same funeral song for my Nan at the same time, while we were county’s apart and speaking to different people …we have a connection I cannot explain.

I felt closer to my family today than I have in a long time. It brought almost a sense of pride that so any people came to the funeral to pay my Father respect. He is such a loving, caring man, he deserved it and so much more. I can’t imagine living life without either of my parents, and so I’m going to endeavour to help him remember that he still has family that loves and adores him. He is my hero.  

Lastly, my Auntie was ridiculous today. Once all the guests had left she immediately started grave robbing. It was crazy. She nearly reduced myself and my cousins to tears. Dividing up trinkets is not what you do on the day of the funeral. I’m sorry, but it’s just damn disrespectful. If I hadn’t been so shocked by it all, I would have had such a go at her. She was the only part of my family that near ruined the day …funerals are bad enough without that.

I’d also just like to say thank you to my friends that have sent me cards, texts, facebook messages/comments/status’  or called me. It means so much to me that you’ve held me in your thoughts today …it would have been a much tougher day without it. Thank you.

In rememberence of
1928 – 2009

Any day can be a day for secrets..

February 11, 2009

One day, this will be you >


How I sometimes feel >


What I want to feel when it’s my time >


Snow day!!

February 3, 2009

There’s no business like snow business!




Mind you, snow is not all fun and games quite like you think. Believe it or not, I did actually try and get to work this morning, but after clearing mycar, falling on my arse, and then scarily skidding around the estate like a fool, I decided to give it a miss. Following this decision mind, I couldn’t even get back to my drive to park so had to leave the car randonlydown the street until the snow cleared in the afternoon!

Like a plague…

January 31, 2009

Guilt is a horrible thing. I’ve decided that I carry too much of it around and I just can’t handle it all anymore. I feel guilty that I don’t have a better job, guilty that my relationship with my brother isn’t as strong as it used to be, guilty that I flirt and lead people on, guilty for not being able to help my relationship to work, guilty that I make other people guilty because I’m unhappy, guilty that I don’t keep in touch with people like I should, guilty for expecting people to change and act on impulse and express themselves when I know they can’t/won’t, guilty that I’m not living life to the fullest, guilty that I don’t chase the things I want  …and to top it all off I’m now pretty wracked with guilt over my Nan’s death.

She passed away early hours of Thursday morning, and I’m left feeling guilty for two reasons:

1) My Dad visited the hospital to see my Nan every single day she was there. Wednesday night I convincedhim not to go and see her but to come to the cinema with me instead. I feel so guilty because, as a result of me, my Father missed his last chance to speak to his Mother.

2) I’ve wished before now that she were dead. I’ve only ever confessed that to one other person, and when I sought absolution for this, they didn’t answer their phone. It’s not been the same since. I can’t get my mind from the fact that I wished she were gone, and now she is. It’s the kind of irrational guilt which I don’t know will ever pass…


“Guilt is perhaps the most painful companion of death.” ~ Coco Chanel

“Guilt is the source of sorrow. ‘Tis the fiend, th’ avenging fiend, that follows us behind with whips and stings” ~ Nicholas Rowe